Wo ist herbst gegangen?
by Distructions Smile
Summary: Ludwig is left to fend for himself in the time WW2, Gilbert went to fight for 'Enigkeit und recht und freiheit' and has fallen in a cold hearted mad man hands, trying to taste freedom once again. Germancest IvanxGilbert Little AntoniaxLovi Hinted GerxIta


A tall young, handsome man, ran through the streets of Berlin at lightning speed, his short normaly sunkissed blond hair, now with a tint of firey orange, falling in unkept strands over his glinstering forehead. The city had the appearance of it almost being on fire it seemed this warm summer evening, the late setting sun casting a nice warming glow of comfort over the entire space. If only it could be like this every day.

The man turned another sharp corner of one of the smaller streets and ran through an even smaller alleyway, running as fast as his feet could carry him with the extra weight of a big leather shoulder bag filled with heavy thick books. His steps slowed down the last few paces and stepped casually out of the ally, if it had not been for his ruffled up hair sticking out of all kinds of places, his simple clothing a little wrinkled and his bright red face from running all the way from home wich was on the out skirts of town and to where he was now, he would have looked as if he wasnt in a hurry to get to the place in mind as fast as possible, before the evening bell of eight oclock rang loud though and for the whole entire city to hear.

The blond male looked up towards the church which held the giant clock, seeing he only had about ten more minutes to get where he was supposed to be in that time, his clear blue eyes with a tint of some darker color, widening because of this.

Sheisse. He half panted quietly to himself, his gaze searching for a familiar grand white building, and capturing its massive apperance in his mind.

Always had he thought that this particiular building looked quite beautiful. The tall thin, probably Roman inspired, porcelain pillars keeping its nice curved white roof standing up. The walls decorated with the finest of craftmanship, and great oak wooden lined windows. Shiny red curtains waving in the directions the soft blow of the breeze would carry it, due to the now still opened windows.

Walking towards the grand building he read, like he did everytime he walked up to it, the big golden letters, carved in the white stone roof.

Library.. He quietly said, not noticing he had said it out loud at all. A little smile, managing to creep its way up his face, and plant itself there until he entered through the dark wooden door, letting out a puff of breath and taking in the smell of old books, he had always liked since of the day his older brother had taught him how to read.

When he thought of his older brother his fond smile began to fade, remembering his pained face when he read the letter he had recieved from the German military, saying he was called to duty to serve and protect the country or as his brother said when he stood in the front door post, cold november wind b lowing in and making his long black trench coat and bright red scarf wave behind him; I do this for Einingkeit und Recht und Freiheit, Ill come back West, i promise!

But he never did

Those where almost the exact words their father had said, about eighteen year ago, before leaving them to live in a small crappy appartment. Gilbert, nine at that time had to earn them some money, so he got a job as a paper boy, given to him by a friend of their dads, some tall, brown haired Italian guy named Aulus Vargas. He was always really nice and everytime they visited him in the bakery which he owned, he gave them some fresh extra buns. Taking pity for their father leaving and no one to take care of them, They somehow came to see him as an unrelated uncle, wich the Italian found very amuzing and cute of course.

As Ludwig walked up the shining white steps of the building his thoughts couldnt stay put for one minute, now almost every memory coming back to him in flashes. His grasp on the white railing tightened, his knuckled going white in the process of it.

He did not want to remember this, he did not want to think about his bother now. He missed him to much and did not want to repeat the dark depression he had to go through, about getting over the fact that his brother may be a prisoner, or worst.. be..

No he didnt even want to have that aweful word in his mind. It had to go away. Not bearing with the fact that it Was probably true and that all this time he had just been getting his hopes up for his brothers return.

As the lonely German man stumbled the rest of the steps up the stairs, he sat down when he had reached the top without falling, not caring if the thick books in his old bag wouldnt be delivered, just wanting a moment to get his mind to settle down again so he could continue on trying to live a normal live.

Ha.. How amusing..

Such thing would now never be possible, would it? No probably not, the mere thought making him grimace with pain stabbing at his heart. It would never be the same without his brother. He-

Ve, Ludwig!~ He heared someone say his name close by, so turning his head in the direction of the speaker, he met the bright chocolate brown eyes of Feliciano, one of his best friends and also Aulus kid, also the one he was meeting at this time of day after having the books brought back to him.

I was wondering where you were, Ve!~ The younger boy chirped happily, sitting down beside him after having closed some of the big windows, his hair blowing in some kind of magical kind of way which made him seem more angelic. Though those thoughts where quickly erased from his mind, not thinking like that of him, not wanting to most of all.

Not because he thought it was wrong, oh no no no, he having done much worse should not be finding love between other men wrong. But also, because he was already head over heels in love, with someone who loved him back just as much with all his heart as he did.

His lover fit with him like a puzzle piece. They difference was so great, but similarities between them even bigger and better that their flaws where all forgotten. Who would even remember those, when staring into the beautiful eyes of the one you love? This thing they both felt, was what war lords and kings and queens fought for, this was the most divine thing anyone could have ever, felt for one another.

He missed him so much. Ludwig wanted to hold him, once more in his arms, too see him one more time, just so maybe his heart would hurt a little less. Oh how he wished that could happen.

He would never stop wishing for that single, wonderful thing.

Ludwig?

He gave Feliciano a half harded glance, not in the mood right now, for one more of his pasta stories or whatever. Though regretting his act when he saw the look of hurt pass over the boys face. Not wanting to make him sad, he laid a hand on his shoulder, offering a slight sad and tired smile.

Im sorry Feliciano, its just been a long day, thats all.. He told the brown headed boy resuringly, taking hold of the railing once again, and standing up, swinging his leather bag over his shoulder.

Im going home now, its to late to bring these back, am i right? He turned to wave, but was stopped by a hand holding his wrist.

A-ah no! I can make an exeption for you if you want! The younger boy chirped again with newly revieved joy, pulling him along to the big wooden door, slipping the key in the copper keylock and walking in.

O-oh Danke, Feliciano

Feliciano just smiled brightly at him and turned on the lights, revealing a grand hall and staircase leading up to the top level. High as the sky bookcases, standing tall against the wall, filled with books where they all, he could not help but feel small amongst them. This was his favorite place to be, the smell, space and everything about it was just perfect. Everything he would need to live for.. for now that is. It only took so little time, or again was he thinking about his brother. But this helped, a little at least.

He made his way after the skipping Italian, placing the rented books on the counter and opening his bags side pocket to bring out an piece of paper, filled with old marks and stamps, of mostly plain blue, red or black ink. He handed the little paper to Feliciano, who flipped it over and checked all the marks quickly, giving it back to him with another one of his sparkling smiles, after having stamped another empty space.

As he placed the paper back in his pocket, he couldnt help but notice the Italian boys stare pointed at him. Finding this not unfamiliar, as he had recieved more of those lately, not knowing why, but feeling a little uncomfortable none the less, turning to look up. His loose blond hair strands falling in front of his cerulean as the ocean coloured eyes, only now noticing the bright red blush, the other boy was wearing on his face.

Was he sick? Such a color of red in a persons face, was probably not such a good sign, right?

Feliciano turned around quickly to hide his blush, but Ludwig now really wanted to know what was going on, so he laid and hand on the brown haired boys shoulder and turned him around, quickly moving a hand too feel his forehead but not finding him burning up as he had expected. The German backed away again to look at Felicianos dark brown eyes.

L-ludwig i-i.. The younger boy stammered, not seeming to find the right words to be said.

Ja? Was ist falsch Feliciano? He asked in a calm tone. Just as he was about to say something else, when he was met with a silance and the boy looking down at the marble floor, he felt himself being backed up against the wall.

Was zur- Feliciano, was machst du? Erklren Sie, was- He was again cut of, but this time by an even bolder act than before. Two soft pairs of lips clashing against his. Ludwigs mind began to spin in little circles than, not having felt this odd sensation in a long time, and somehow feeling more secure like this. Not really thinking, as he began to kiss back, feeling the other part its lips, and slipping in his tongue to rub against the others. By this act he recieved many aprriciating noises from the boy against him. He would have never though Feliciano was such a good kisser-

His eyes widened at that moment.

What was he doing, kissing someone now? Feliciano non the less, his best friend and nothing more! Why was he doing this? Was he trying to find comfort in anothers warmth? Had the loneliness and sadness finally gone to his head, which made him want to have any kind of contact with another person? Was that it? It had to be, otherwise he wouldnt be doing this, for so many reasons. For one, he felt absolutely nothing for the little Vargas, and second, his heart was beginning to ache again, it felt like he was betraying his lover, wich in all truths he kind of was. But he knew he didnt mean too.

Ludwig grabbed Feliciano by the shoulders, pushing him away and breaking the unwanted kiss. He stared hard into the glowing of the little Italian, his cheeks beginning to tint pink, and is this would be a cartoon, the German would have a big vein pulsing on his head from annoyance.

He saw the Vargas beginning to close in on him again, probably wanting to do the same thing they did a second ago. But he stopped with his lips close to Ludwigs ear, standing on his tip toes to reach that level. Ludwig.. please stop being so clueless.. He nipped almost silently if it was not for a shuffle, at the taller mans ear, wish made the German wince and shivers run up his spine in an unpleasant manner.

I know.. you wanted this.. I know you need it.. He wispered low, kissing and nipping his jaw line and following it till he was by his chin.

You have to come back to the real world Ludwig, Gilbert is gone, there was nothing you could do to help and im sorry, but im here to fill the empty space, ill always be here for you. Ti amo Ludwig.. The last part of his sentence was whispered against his lips, feeling the little Italian rub his little nose against the bigger Germans.

Ludwig couldnt stand it anymore, he couldnt stand how his best friend was talking about his lover as if he was gone. Well he wasnt, he just knew he wasnt. Ludwig could feel just feel it in his bones.

The tall blong male looked down at the smaller of the two, disgust visible in blue eyes.

Feliciano He said in a dark voice, so unlike his normal one. When he spoke in this voice he made the Italian look him straight in the eyes, smiling calm but somehow with a hint of cruelty.

Dont you Dare, talk about Gilbert in that way. Ever. Again. He spoke loud and clear, pushing the boy off of him and picking up his bag. Walking a few paces before he was prevented to do so, by a quiet sob. His eyes glinted as he saw Feliciano, cry. Tears streaming down his usually tanned rozy cheeks. Where did this come from? Did the boy realy love him? Well than it was one sided, because he felt really nothing. Nothing at all. Not even when he saw him cry glinstering crocodile tears, not even when he saw the boy reach out to him with one hand.

L-ludwig please pl-please Not even when his best friend, begged him.

Please f-face reality! If Gilbert loved you s-so much, why would he have left you? You tell me that Ludwig, because i dont seem to be able to find the answer-

That was where the German snapped.

Shut your damn mouth, you schweinhund! I know he loved and still loves me! Hes alive, and i will prove it! With that yelled at Feliciano, and out of his system, he threw open the grand library doors, storming away, and into the now dusk coloured streets of Berlin.


End file.
